The Attraction Switch

It's one of these things that puzzles people. Its one of these things that people react to. ITs one of these things that most people are unaware of how or why it comes to existance. And it is one of these things, in which many people subconsciously turn... "ON".

WHAT IS THE ATTRACTION SWITCH?
It is indeed a switch. A switch that can be "turned on" and "turned off" by an external factor. That factor, is the opposite of your sex. There are no rules. There are no policies. But there are standards within each one of us as to how and when that switch operates.

Standards are the equivalent of our own self worth. The lower the standards, the lower the self worth. Mind you though, this does NOT necessarily imply you're a person with bad taste, or someone who does not value him/herself, but it rather tells YOU, and ONLY YOU, how much self worth you have for yourself.

Don't mix this up with the way society has conditioned us. This particular area will be discussed in another blog post.

Back to topic.

WHY DOES IT EXIST?
It is a subconscious act that we will seek the opportunity to allow that switch to operate whenever a plausable and qualified candidate is nearby. However, it puzzles a lot of people as to how and when the Attraction Switch operates. As in, how we label that person as "attractive".

Without being attracted to someone, we cannot get into relationships. Relationships don't just happen. There's chemistry involved. Chemistry comes from interacting with someone who you are attracted to. Regardless of your intention out of that relationship, our minds subconsciously perceive the people we are attracted to as ones who we would want to be with for a period of time.

It's like that girl you spotted on the dancefloor at the nightclub the other night as her hips swayed gently on the dancefloor and looked at you so seductively. Or that man that walked swiftly, yet pursuingly past you at the local beach. Or that opposite sex which you met at a social gathering when your eyes locked contact for seconds which seemed like hours. You feel that deep tingling, yet sensual feeling? That's the switch. And that's how it is turned on.



As much as the time taken to switch it on is concerned, the length is not really a big factor. The Attraction Switch can be turned on in a matter of seconds, or hours, or days.... Whatever.

The operation of this switch depends on the following:

The most important factor that turns on this switch is obviously the exterior. Looks. I mean, it is what matters so much, right?

WRONG!!!

Looks mark no signifance whatsoever towards the attractiveness of a person. what REALLY matter are:

1. Social Value
2. Health
3. Confidence
4. Attitude

These 4 factors have absolutely nothing to do with anything superficial or materialistic such as money, the car you drive, the house you live in. All these things are merely pointers to the 4.



1. SOCIAL VALUE
This is by far one of the most important things that will by all means attract the opposite sex to you. However, the depth of its meaning varies from one culture to another. Social value is merely you place in the society. How are you expressing yourself to the people around you and how do they respond to that. Your value, as a person, to a community is highly regarded by the opposite sex because it indicates how well you are situated within them in terms of:

a. Social status
b. Your ability to socialize and meet people
c. Your ability to communicate
d. Your ability to express yourself freely
e. The way you handle situations and experiences

The above list, however, is not exclusive to social value. There are far more indicators to the opposite sex that your social value is in a good condition.

The simplest, and yet most common, example for someone with good social value is someone who is surrounded by a good, trustworthy, self fulfilling social circle. The fact that this particular person surrounds him/herself with this kind of social circle makes the attracted person feel secure and comfortable when introduced to them.

A stranger of the opposite sex might think "Who is THIS? He seems to be very welcomed and loved by his friends and family. There MUST be something about him/her!"

The higher the social value, the higher the attraction level. Let's take an extreme example: His Highness Sheikh Hamdan Bin Mohamed Bin Rashid Al Maktoum (aka Fazaa).

His social value is extremely high. He is surrounded by top leaders around the globe, including his father, H.H. Sheikh Mohamed Bin Rashid Al Maktoum. His presence is not ignored due to the magnificance of people who are constantly enriching his presence.

Again, he is only an extreme example. I only used it to give you a clear idea of what good social value looks like.

2. HEATLH
This is ultimately the number one factor affecting the operation of the Attraction Switch that gets commonly confused by how someone "looks". Why? Imagine now that you are being approached by a total stranger. Someone who is fairly on the larger weight scale. He/she looks somewhat fatigued, doesn't have the best body odor you have ever smelt, yet is the nicest person you have met. What is your perception? Some might brush them off, some might continue to talk, others might break rapport at one point and leave. Bottom line: the switch remains off. There are, of course, exceptions. Though I speak of the bigger picture. The reality.

Why does this happen?

The impression that is made here indicates that this particular person is not someone you can picture yourself being with. Why? They are simly not healthy enough. Health will affect the future of the siblings those 2 people might have some day. It's a simple, subconscious thought that most of us are not aware of. This is why we get "turned off". However, if you imagine yourself being approached by a sculptured the gentlest of all males/females, with a healthy, yet sexy, figure, you are instantly setting to the switch to "ON". With big green lights flashing with it. So big you just can't resist their slightest touch, or presence, of breath.

Again, the examples mentioned are extreme. They are merely used to give the idea more clarity. I want you to invision yourself in those situations as you read them and notice how your breathing changes. How your physiology reacts to it. How your emotions vary from one experience to another.

Health is an important factor when it comes to attraction. Health is an indicator that the person of the opposite sex can take care of him/herself, lives in a healthy environment and a healthy lifestye, enforces health as part of his daily routine and conditions his/her mind to health.

If someone is living a healthy lifestyle, it implies that he/she is in a healthy state of mind. Your health will always determine the way you carry yourself in life. Some people are obese, yet maintain a clean environment around them. Others are genetically ill, yet enjoy eating healthy food. Health does no necessarily relate to obesity or excess weight. It's a multi-dimensional area in our lives which can be forged into different forms.

It is often confused with someone being good looking due to the way our society has conditioned our mind to think like this:

Healthy = Good looking

Which is absolutely, and purely, bullshit.

Looking good can be a result of good health, but it is not equal to it. It is only an indication that you take care of your own health and that you maintain that kind of lifestyle. This is why women find "good looking" men attractive. Regardless of their spoken observations such as "O.M.G. he's so hot!", the notion is actually related to his health. It means that this man, is healthy. He is a provider of health. His children will be healthy someday. His family is probably healthy too. And so on.

The above also applies for men seeking attractive women. Health is a major factor for many men nowadays as it defines to them how their future will be with them.

3. CONFIDENCE
The single, most powerful factor of all. This is the ultimate weapon for anyone who does not necessarily have any of the 4 factors mentioned above sorted out. It is the easiest attribute in any human that affects the operation of the Attraction Switch.

Confidence is the biggest indicator to the opposite sex that he/she is a risk taker, puts him/herself on the line, does not identify with fear, and is an absolute achiever. Confident people are ones who do not entirely focus much on "what if", but rather "this is". They are the kind of people who have "the word of God" so to speak. Meaning, what they say and do is final. Nothing can come their way (unless from God, or "the universe" to the others) and if anything will, then it's okay. Confident people are accepting, forgiving, and take action. They do not rely on their emotions, nor do they make much use of logic. They don't have mental dialogues. They. Just. Go for it. Risk to them is an illusion. Because even if they fall, they are ready to get back up even stronger than ever.



To many of us, confidence is a necessary key factor to the future of 2 people who will be attracted to each other and form a relationship.

Imagine now, a confident person. What's their posture like? How do they walk? How do they stand? What's their vocal tonality like? Are they seeking rapport? Or are they breaking it? Are they shy? Or are they upfront and straight forward? What is fear to them?

If you cannot truly identify the answers for these questions, look up a person on Google who you might think is confident. A very good example is Barack Obama, president of the USA. Why? Simple. His presence is NOT ignored when he walks into a room.

Confident people carry this thick, dense, solid energy with them. It's absolutely rock solid to the point that their presence in any place is not ignored. They are people who give value by just being... there!

Picture this: You're minding your own business somewhere - could be the street, mall, work, whatever - and you are approached by the person I described above from the opposite sex. Think about it. Think about how you would react to him/her. How you would emote to them. What would you be thinking? What would you be wanting to do to/with them?

On the other hand, picture the very opposite: A shy, apologetic, fearful person from the opposite sex, approaching you.

Who do you see yourself more with?

Who turns you... "ON"?

4. ATTITUDE

Attitude is my way of describing certain personality traits that are crucial to the operation of the Attraction Switch. After all, most of us look for the personality traits and not the way the opposite sex looks.

If we're talking about males, their attitude can include leadership, dominance, an abundant mindset, a good control of emotions, and so on.

If we're talking about females, their attitude can include a pure sense of self, self worth, and so on.

There various parts of our attitudes that most of us prefer to have in the opposite sex we would get attracted to. An attitude is basically an approach to life. The tools that we use to achieve and empower ourselves. It is the reason why some of us might wonder about the opposite sex and say "there's something about him/her! I just can't put my finger on it!"

It is a deep side of our intuition that guides us towards that switch to turn it on. Our own perceptions of the attitude(s) in the person we would like to be attracted to differs from one person to another. However, the context is the same.

Unfortunately, attitude is usually mistaken in males for being arrogant and assholes, and bitchy and stuck up in females. This is just a projection that clearly tells us we are attracted to people who are free spririted, are not ego-functional, and have a solid sense of self worth, empowerment, and achievement.



The 4 explained factors here relate more to the core and depth of our true selves. This is where the true mechanics of our minds, bodies, and souls function. In fact, the idea of the "switch" is simply an idea. It doesn't exist. It is a subconscious thought. A requirement. A necessity.

As much as the above is self explainatory on some level, we are all deeply connected with our own switches. The Attraction Switch is one of them. An important one of them.

Are these 4 factors exclusive for the switch to operate and cause us to be attracted to someone else?

The answer is simply no. Your reality differs from others. However, the above form some sort of a baseline for attraction to arise.

If you're still wondering as to how looks are not a factor when it comes to the Attraction Switch, then I'll let you go with this thought: Be hygene, well-groomed, dress appropriately (you don't have to follow a fashion trend to dress well), and be presentable and approachable. That is it!